ERB: Mary Shelley Vs. Annette Funicello

Bunny Meyer as Annette Funicello
Jenna Marbles as Mary Shelley
Epic Lloyd as Victor Frankenstein
Nice Peter as Frankenstein's Monster
Bart Baker as Lady Lovely Locks
Casey Jane Ellison as The Bride of Frankenstein



Epic Rap Battles of History



Mary Shelley


Vs.

Annette Funicello



BEGIN!



Mary:


Hello there horror fans
Mary's here to share the terror
It's the creator of Frankenstein
Against this children's book error
I got inspired by a bad dream to pave the way
For this movie monster legend
While your books are sold on Amazon
And lost inside the Goodwill bins
You may have hung with Avalon on the beach
But my rhymes will hang you by your neck
The original release of Lovely Locks was not that dark
Last time I checked
You maybe popular with little girls and women children
That's no lie
Why don't you and your legions of fans go under a rock
And fucking hide?


Annette:

For your information Shelley
I didn't write the books
But American Greetings did
I simply gave my John Hancock
And really that was it
Your nightmare bringing Frankenstein to life
Was the greatest I ever heard
You inspired many horror writers
Front to back with every word
Truth is I really didn't want to get involved
By I had to earn the money
Don't get upset with me Mary
Go attack Kristen Brown honey
I had a better time in Mickey's Club
Than I did endorsing a kids' book
You can find all the Lovely Locks episodes
On YouTube so go an take a look


Mary:

There's no way I'm watching such a sugary-sweet monstrosity
So shove that idea of yours straight up your arse Missy
You should've stuck to playing in the sand
And not endorsing such shite
You give readers diabetes while I fill them with fright!
You wanna know what I think?
I'm glad that cartoon is extinct
It sure as hell did stink
Its popularity will soon sink



Lovely Locks:

If my cartoon stinks so much
How come I'm still frequently watched?
You may have wrote a great book Shelly
But Frankenstein's at Party City
I represent children's innocence while you
Represent a man with a bolted neck
My pixietails are calling me
Is this battle over yet?


Victor Frankenstein:

Oh this battle will be over quicker
Than my monster's reanimation
You seem to anger men and women
All across the world and nation


Frankenstein's Monster:

I maybe scared of fire
But every little child loves me
I'll tell you one thing little girl
Your cartoon ain't what it used to be
I'd bitch-slap you
But it's not within me to do so
So let me leave that to my honey
The shrieking big haired horror ho


Bride of Frankenstein:

Where in your books and cartoon
Does it say that you find love?
Your cartoon sucks a lot of cock
You ain't no gift from above
Lovely Locks, you and Annette
Can go suck it
We'll live forever in cinema
But this battle is finished



WHO WON?!
WHO'S NEXT?!
YOU DECIDE!